“The daycare has added a new bomb shelter inside the infant room,” my daughter told me as she described the center she has decided to use for her daughter.
I gagged when she told me. Before this specific bomb shelter was built, the day care providers would have to grab all the babies and run them to the shelter that was in the toddler area when sirens sounded. Now it will be so much easier to get the babies to safety!
I guess it is a matter of perspective. The idea of a bomb shelter in the infant room is great if you are constantly under bombardment. Thus, I agree having this room right near the infants is wonderful. My gag was in response that my grandchild has to be in a daycare center with bomb shelters. The perils of Israel.
When we finished our call, I stress-ate six Oreo peanut butter chocolate cookies. It will take me a week to work off these six cookies, but it will take me forever to come to terms with my infant grandchild in a daycare that has two bomb shelters.
It was bad enough that my daughter gave birth while the Houthis launched a ballistic missile at Israel. My daughter labored in a birthing room that was also a bomb shelter. They were safe, we were safe, but it really was indicative of the Israeli lifestyle — just keep living around the sirens. But this is not normal.
The constant denial of what the Israelis have endured for the almost 80 years of the country’s existence frustrates me. Wars, attacks, barrages both military and in media — the world’s warped reality doesn’t quite match the reality of Israel.
Do the Israelis even realize how much they should be suffering? Perhaps not. Israel still ranks in the top ten happiest nations in a global survey. This past March, they scored as the eighth happiest nation (as per the World Happiness Report).
Finland, Denmark, Iceland, Sweden, Netherlands, Costa Rica and Norway are the only countries that were happier. And having been in Scandinavia, I understand. When it is that cold, you just look at the world in a different way. As I learned in Denmark, “There is no bad weather. There are only bad clothes.”
Perhaps in Israel, it is, “If you did not die, then it is okay!” Alan King’s joke about Jewish holidays still is true: “They tried to kill us. We won. Let’s eat.”
I recently met with two Israeli women who are traveling in the U.S. to raise funds for schools for Muslim and Jewish children. We talked about the atmosphere in Israel. I said I think everyone in Israel has PTSD. The Muslim woman disagreed. She thinks everyone in Israel is still in the trauma stage. That they just are so used to being in this state that they don’t even realize it is not a normal way to live.
Israel has changed since Oct. 7. The atmosphere has been better since the return of the last of the living hostages, but the angst remains. How can it not? So many young people have been murdered. So many horrible stories shared of what happened. So many unable to bear the burden they have from surviving. Those that died by suicide are also victims of Hamas.
I was in Israel in November 2022. It was really a joyful place to be. The horrors had not yet occurred. The economy was booming. Tourism, tech companies, industry, agriculture, construction — life was good. I have been back twice this year. Tourism is down. Construction is stymied. With fewer employees, incomplete buildings stand with quiet cranes.
I went in May just before the war with Iran. I heard the bombers flying overhead.
“Wow, there are lots of flights today,” I said to my daughter.
“Mom, it’s Shabbat. Those are not commercial airlines,” she said. “Military planes are exempt from Shabbat.”
I went in July and August after the destruction of Hamas, Hezbollah and Iran’s missiles and drones. It was much quieter. I began to hope that it would be peaceful.
Now that almost all the hostages are home, I want it to end. I do not want my infant grandchild to have to be protected by a bomb shelter at day care. I do not want any child to grow up in a world where having a safe room in their home is normal. No child anywhere should live this way. It is not normal.
Ellen Portnoy has a master’s degree in journalism from the University of Missouri. She is an active community volunteer who has traveled to Israel many times.
