Grace Steinberg Day, 89, of St. Joseph, Missouri, passed away July 13, 2016, after a very brief illness. She was born in Onawa, Iowa, in 1926, the daughter of Polish immigrants who journeyed to America after World War 1.
Her parents owned the town shoe store and Grace worked there when she was a child. She attended college at the University of South Dakota and excelled in speech, dramatics and debate. Those interests led her to select what was then an unusual field for women — law. Grace was not the first woman to attend the University of South Dakota School of Law but during her time in the late 1940s, she was the only woman and her fortitude and tenacity carried her through those challenging times when society, including her peers and professors, believed women did not belong in the profession. She would reflect later that “I’m not a quitter and had no intention of leaving law school.”
She married the love of her life, Milton “Boob” Day, who brought her to St. Joseph, Missouri, to begin their new life. Together, they raised a family while Grace pursued her family law practice, and for more than 30 years was the only woman lawyer in St. Joseph. When no law firms would hire her, she struck out on her own as a solo practitioner until the late 1990s when she was approached by the then-prominent law firm Shughart Thomson & Kilroy, now Polsinelli. She became known around town as a “lady lawyer” tough on men but as her reputation grew, Grace began to represent men, as well as women, in divorce and custody cases. She liked to tell the story of asking the first man who approached her for representation why he selected her. His response was “so my wife didn’t get you first.” She was equally proud of advocating for men in custody cases during a time when the courts typically selected mothers as the primary caretaker.
Her law partner Dan Boulware describes Grace “as an icon, plain and simple.” Another partner, Edwin Smith, often remarked “they broke the mold with Grace. We are never going to see another one quite like her.” She went on to represent hundreds of families in Northwest Missouri for 64 years, and earned accolades including Missouri Lawyer Weekly’s “Woman of the Year,” and became president of the St. Joseph Bar Association. Nationally, she gained prominence as the international president of B’nai B’rith Women and made frequent trips to Washington, D.C., to meet with dignitaries including President Gerald Ford, Secretary of State Henry A. Kissinger and Sen. Edward M. Kennedy. She was able to build her successful career with the help of her husband Milton. They raised two children, Allison Day and Douglas Day, who both became attorneys. When Grace retired in 2013, she took frequent trips and traveled to see her children who live on each coast. Impeccably dressed even in her late 80s, Grace loved to shop and Allison described her as a “champion shopper.” Close friends knew her for her love of monkeys and she collected dozens of stuffed monkeys, which lined her recreation room.
Whether Grace realized it or not, she was a legal trailblazer for women in law. She opened the door for future generations of women attorneys and leaves behind a powerful legacy although she was always too modest to admit her impact. One of the recent highlights of her life was a recent trip back to her law school where she learned that 40 percent of the law students are women. A documentary, “Amazing Grace,” has been produced about her life and it is being played on PBS stations in the Midwest.
Grace joins her beloved husband Milton “Boob” Day, and leaves behind a brother, Harry Steinberg, St. Joseph, Missouri; daughter, Allison R. Day and son-in-law, James Feltman, Coconut Grove, Florida; and son Douglas L. Day, Pacific Palisades, California; and granddaughter Rachel B. Day, Brooklyn, New York.
Farewell Services took place July 17 at Meierhoffer Funeral Home & Crematory. Interment followed at B’Nai Yaakov Cemetery.
Flowers are appreciated and for those wishing to make a contribution, the family requests they be made to American Cancer Society.
Online guest book and obituary at www.meierhoffer.com.